I don't know how long it's been since I posted here, but it's been awhile. I've moved back to Illinois from Colorado, started a new job and am looking for a new place to live. All these are stressful things, any one of which would be enough to derail recovery. Together they really push me to retreat to old, addictive coping mechanisms. It's a daily challenge to keep making healthy choices and, in all honesty, I don't always succeed. No one does. The road of recovery is hard work that requires employing newly learned disciplines and leaning on others in ways I'm still not used to.
No one will tell you recovery is easy and if they do, run because they're selling something that just isn't true. You can't take a pill to get skinny, you can't grow hair with a scalp massage and you can't get recovery with a half effort. Old habits die hard and, in my humble opinion, they never truly die at all. They can wither from neglect or go into hibernation, but just like a bear in springtime they can come alive and devour you if the conditions are right. You can make the effort to see that the conditions are never right. Learn more by going to a recovery meeting. Go tonight. Go now! Your recovery is waiting. So is your addiction.